Question #84

If there is no up or down or around in space, then why do all space movies show spaceships about to do battle as facing each other on the same plane?

Question #83

Just what is it about a 4 month old's smile that automatically makes you smile?

Question #82

Why doesn't kryptonite affect humans if it can affect super-humans?

Question #81

If a priest delivers a really boring sermon, can he be considered a "mass" murderer?

Question #80

Was just humming the Bumblebee Tuna theme song to myself when this popped into my head:

What IS a bumble?

Question #79

Okay, I just got this from Amazon.com:

We've noticed that customers who have purchased The Phantom Tollbooth by Norton Juster also purchased books by Marian Macsai. For this reason, you might like to know that Marian Macsai's Ophthalmic Microsurgical Suturing Techniques will be released soon. You can pre-order your copy by following the link below.

Today's Hmm question is this: What could POSSIBLY be the connection between the Phantom Tollbooth, a children's book, and Ophthalmic Microsurgical Suturing Techniques.

Best original answer will get posted below as an addendum.

Question #78

Why is it that the stuff you don't procrastinate on, nobody asks about, but the stuff you procrastinate on, are the stuff people want five minutes after they give it to you?

Question #77

Is it possible to loathe half the work you do, and still not go postal at a job?

Question #76

Why does every neighborhood that contains kids, also contain a "haunted house" (or variations thereof - my neighborhood had a witches coven) and every kid in the neighborhood can point it out?

As an adult, I now realize that designated witches' house was probably the house of a couple of lesbians trying to live in peace.

Question #75

You know those balding men who grow their few remaining strands of hair really long, then sweep the strands into a circle on top of their heads? Well, this Hmm Question is directed to the female equivalent.

Do those women with thinning hair, really think that perming their hair into curls would hide the onset of baldness?

I guess so, otherwise, why would so many women do it?

Question #74

Are humans the only creatures on earth, to run screaming away from things they're afraid of, like spiders?

I don't think I've ever seen a dog/cat/bird scream and shake in terror when a bug falls on them.

Question #73

Do you think all those girls named Muffy, Buffy, Missy, etc. and all those boys named Biff, Chip and Blake are still called those names?

For the record, my pal who IS named Blake, does go by it... I guess it's not *that* preppy of a name. Hmm, just realized I know two people named Blake.

Question #72

Where did the term Esquire come from and why does it mean attorney/lawyer?

Question #71

Why does watching someone fall flat on their face, make us laugh?

Question #70a, b & c

Why do recorded messages that call you, NEVER start at the beginning?

Is there no technology in the world that determines when a phone picks up? I understand if the answering machine picked up, that the timing would be off, but even when I pick up the phone? So, as a corollary Hmm Question:

Do these dumbass marketers really think that not being able to hear the first part of the message would entice people to call back?

Or do they figure that if you're sucker enough to call back, you're sucker enough to buy whatever it is they're selling?

Question #69

I know saying "Bless you" to a sneeze originated with the belief that when you sneeze, part of your soul is being jetted out of you. But here's the Hmm Question: How does saying "Bless you" protect you from losing bits of your soul or preventing the devil from taking bits of your soul as it falls with your spittle?

I mean, does it form a protective barrier and somehow by osmosis, slip the bits of your soul back into you?

Question #68

Why did "those twins", (non-speaking) spokespersons for Coors Brewing Co., disappear when Pete Coors ran for the U.S. Senate?

Question #67

Why don't researchers understand that this (not knowing how to work electronic gadgets) is the EXACT equivalent to men screwing up in the kitchen so they don't have to do any work?

I mean you don't see research after research about men's SEEMING inability to wash dishes without breaking one as a sign of their inferiority, do you?

Sheesh!

Question #66

Joshua Micah Marshall asks over at Time.com: could it be possible that "In the Bush era, the timing and quality of "arrests" and "warnings" have a suspicious ring"?

Josh Marshall is one of my favorite journalist/bloggers, who blogs on Talking Points Memo and also is the editor-in-chief of TPMMuckracker and TPMCafe. He's concise, honest, and has a wry sense of humor.

Question #65

If the flag-burning amendment gets passed and the U.S. constitution gets changed, would burning this microscopic flag constitute a federal crime, even if you can't see the flag?

Question #64

It's really going to get much worse before it gets better, isn't it?

Ref: the militarization of Japan's thinking, the bombs in Bombay, the violence between Israel and Lebanon, N. Korea, Iran, Iraq, Pakistan, India, the lose of respect for U.S. military forces, etc.

Question #63

What if the Rapture already happened, and nobody noticed?

Everytime I get onto a light traffic highway, I mutter, "Ah, the Rapture must've happened. Good, I'll be on time."

Question #62

Where did the phrase "... everything but the kitchen sink" come from and why did it get started?

Question #61

If eyes are the windows to the soul, what are the soles?

Question #60

Would you not agree with me, that the ONE commonality of all human nature, is the desire to find short-cuts?

Just realized my phraseology is oh so veddy British here. The U.S. version would be, Don'cha think that the one thing in common among all humans is the desire to find short-cuts?

Question #58 & 59

If all the frogs and toads die off, how will we find Prince/ss Charming?

On a more serious note, the corollary:

If all the frogs and toads die off, does that mean the insect population will explode and what will that mean for mammals?

Question #57

If your child is a genius, would you have to expose him/her to everything to find out where the genius lay, or would he/she figure it out on his/her own?

(Basically, if there were no pianos [OK! I know the piano wasn't really invented when Bach was around - it was the harpsichord and organ] around Johann Sebastian Bach, would we have gotten to know his genius?)

Question #56

Why do we have no problems remember things like the street address we lived on for a year when we were 8, but can't remember what we ordered last night for dinner.

First one who answers old age, gets an internet virus - so there!

Question #55

Why are so many of us influenced by the weather?

Question #54

Why do insurance companies collect your money so quickly and yet pay out on claims so slowly?

Question #53

Submitted by Bratworse:

What is the hardest to teach? and alternatively, What is the hardest to learn?

She suggests that learning how to listen is the hardest.

Question #52

Why is it when bosses say that they want things organized, they really mean, I want YOU to be able to tell me where everything is, without me having to look it up, even though everything is logged and easily accessible?

Yes, I have one of those bosses. Lucky me. Yeah yeah, it's not really a Hmm question but geeze, I need to release the frustration somehow.

Question #51

What happens to feathers you breathe in, in the middle of the night?

Question #50

Why is it so hard to come up with Hmm questions when you're not in a contemplative mood?

Question #49

Why do people who sing off-key, sing the loudest?

(Yes, I'm guilty of this axiom)